Write-ups & true life

NELSON MANDELA: The true story of a legend

Nelson Mandela, former South African president, wrote a personal awesome story: After I became president, one day I asked some members of my close protection to stroll with me in the city, and have lunch at one of its restaurants. We sat in one of the downtown restaurants and all of us asked for some sort of food. After a while, the waiter brought us our requests. I noticed that there was someone sitting in front of my table waiting for food. I told one of the soldiers: Go and ask that person to join us with his food and eat with us. The soldier went and asked the man so. The man brought up his food and sat by my side as I asked and began to eat. His hands were trembling constantly until everyone had finished their food and the man went. The soldier said to me: The man was apparently quite...

The twist of life and why you should value people

Few weeks ago, I was driving on Apapa-Oshodi expressway and stopped briefly under the Ilasamaja Bridge to pick a call. Suddenly, a Danfo bus pulled up beside me, the bus conductor jumped out and landed by my side. I thought I was about to be robbed! However, the conductor had other plans. ‘Oshodi Oshodi Oshodi o. I heaved a sigh of relief and breathed deeper, then I saw a guy I’d known for long. Years of separation couldn’t play on me any trick. He was one of the brightest guys in our class back then, and had won for us a couple of Inter-School competitions. He was of a modest middleclass family that valued education and when he says a word is ‘adjectival proverb’ or ‘future present past participle’, we dared not argue because he was usually and al...

How to still achieve your 2019 goals this year

How would it feel if you could end this year on a high note, having met all your set goals? That would be a very wonderful feeling for anyone – but, with just six months left in the year, many people will be thinking that their 2019 targets have already been missed. This is especially so if you are lagging behind the set period during which you were expecting to reach some of the milestones on the road towards meeting your goals. So, when you find yourself in this position, what do you do? Would you give up? Does it mean you should stop having goals? No, it does not! You still have six months left in the year to get your acts together – there are still six months to accomplish your 2019 goals. But you need to know what to do in order to make sure that you still finish 2019 strong. Regardle...

What I learnt when I tried to kill myself

A few weeks ago I joined the same exclusive club as Drew Barrymore, Eminem, Britney Spears and a host of other celebs. Like your average A-list party, there was plenty of booze and a few pills involved. There was a trip to casualty, too – again, not atypical. But this was a party of one. Mired in sadness, devoid of hope, and brooding on a stupid fight with my partner, I sat in my bedroom and necked anti-depressants (oh the irony) like Smarties, all washed down with a tidal wave of whisky. I barely remember what followed immediately afterwards. All I know is that I survived, thanks to the swift actions of said partner. My friend G (full name withheld as her family still refuses to accept that she committed suicide) did the same thing seven years ago, at exactly the same age I am now. She wa...

True life story: My wife died because of my pride

Wifey and I had a little argument over breakfast on a Monday morning while we were both preparing for the day’s job. My anger was with the way she spread the butter on the bread that morning, it was quite rough and not pleasing to the eyes though I corrected her with my voice sounding like a thunder all over the room but I never knew it would lead to this, if I had known, I would have overlooked and ate the bread without uttering a word after all, I ate it still. Hearing the way I rose my voice at her, really made her mad and she left the dinning without having breakfast that morning and off she went to work without me that day not even saying goodbye to each other. I was mad, she was mad too and our mistake was that none of us was willing to come to like terms. We returned from work that ...

Girl, 10, starved to death and set on fire in bin by evil stepmum

The delicious smell of freshly baked cookies filled the apartment in Gwinnett County, Georgia. Tiffany Moss pulled out the warm batch from the oven and left them to cool on the kitchen worktop. She’d had a craving for chocolate all day and had made her husband Eman pick up some cookie dough on the way home from work. When they were ready, Tiffany and Eman tucked in with their two young children. They were a picture of a perfect family, but in the bedroom nearby, the scent of the cookies was torture. A young girl lay weak on a bed, stomach empty and her limbs just skin and bone after weeks of barely eating. She wasn’t allowed to feast like the rest of her family – in fact, she didn’t feel like she was part of the family at all. Emani, 10, was dying and no one was doing anything to stop it. ...

Rape in Nigeria and America

Sir: Let us take the case of one “Solomun” who is said to be facing the rape storm currently. Solomun is not a member of the Masquerade Team but nevertheless a human being. I commend the committee that did the investigation, even though we are waiting for the end to justify the means. The other time in Ọbafẹmi Awolọwọ University, the female student who went to ask for higher score was not punished but the teacher who asked for sex in return bagged two years.  Hence I said men are becoming endangered species in the hands of women. The other time, it was the younger sister of the accuser who saved the accused from being lynched, saying “I saw my sister putting her own underwear in the man’s bag” and the accuser endured only small beating from the boys who would have set the accused man ablaz...

29 yr old has given up relationships and sex to become a nun

Theodora Hawksley, 29, has recently moved into an unusual house-share. Her housemates are, as she puts it, three women the age of her mother and three women the age of her grandmother. The oldest is 89. Her meals and accommodation are paid for, but she gets just a small allowance to cover everything else, including travel, haircuts and clothes – which she gets from charity shops. Oh, and relationships and sex are off the cards, forever. Theo, who I met last week, is a nun. Her lifestyle may sound alien to you or me, but she is happy and fulfilled – “I’ve hit my stride as a person,” she says. And she’s not alone. New figures from the Catholic Church show that last year the number of women becoming nuns in England and Wales hit a 25-year high, with 45 new recruits sig...

So fat people would hurl food and abuse at me

People can be shockingly cruel, a fact that Debbie, who weighed more than 26 stone at her heaviest, knows only too well. ‘I was spat at. People would stare and laugh. It happened daily. They’d shout at me from cars saying, “You’re fat, you’re ugly.” They were just mean,’ she says. ‘The worst time, I was walking along the street with a friend and a car went past with two young women in it. They threw a kebab at me and shouted, “Here you go, you fat f**k.”’ Throughout all this humiliation, Debbie never fought back. ‘I thought I was worthless, I was nothing, I felt like a piece of sh*t because society told me I was. I absolutely hated myself. I had no mirrors in my house, there are no photos of me with my kids growing up,’ says Debbie, who would try to mask her true feelings with ‘the fat and...

I was raped on my wedding night

Growing up, I always felt trapped between two cultures. My family was very traditional – we weren’t allowed to have our legs on show or have friends who were boys, I wasn’t allowed on sleepovers or to go to the cinema. I always felt like I was missing out. There was no discussion – my sister and I just knew that certain things were completely out of bounds. My family was perfectly happy for us to finish our education early and just get married. I ran away from home when I was 18. I desperately wanted my freedom and I didn’t want to be forced into a religion or a marriage that wasn’t for me. But my family couldn’t handle it and they did everything they could – including harassing my friends and contacting the police – to get me back. “After three months o...

Sex addiction is now so common

Sex addiction is more common than thought affecting a tenth of men and a twelfth of women, a study found. The allegations surrounding Harvey Weinstein and the rise of the Me too Movement suggested sex addiction has become an epidemic within society. Yet despite media coverage following high profile sexual scandals, there was no accurate estimate of how prevalent it was. Now a new US study suggests while men have more trouble controlling their urges, the gender gap is closing as more women are also experiencing sex addiction. This could be down to changing sexual mores, sexual liberation and the rise of internet porn and apps such as Tinder that allow for commitment free hook-ups. And those with lower education, those with very high or very low income, and racial, ethnic and sexual minoriti...

Vittorio the Penniless Traveler

Throughout my many years of roaming around the globe, I have had the good luck to become acquainted with a great number of other people doing the same. Out of them all, many fell into the category of the so-called budget travelers. Some of them traveled possessing a fair amount of savings but would try to keep their expenses as low as possible so to extend their traveling time to the greatest achievable length. Others had no savings but a secured influx of a small recurring income. There was that one guy, though, who had taken the concept of budget traveling to the next level: to the level of literally moneyless traveling. The bloke was outright broke. In this story, you will meet Vittorio: a guy from the Italian region of Puglia whom I once had the chance to briefly meet, and his boldness...