A broken person is not easy to love. Sometimes we focus so much
on the symptoms of their brokenness instead finding out why they
are broken. The symptoms could be low self esteem, fear,
hopelessness, withdrawal tendencies, addictions, anger, paranoia,
indecisiveness and a guard put up around them.
What leads to brokenness? Sexual abuse that happened in the
past, the death of a loved one, loss of a job, major disappointment
from people in the past, a miscarriage, an abortion they did a while
back, abandonment by their parents, a difficult childhood, bullying
especially while growing up and a pathetic lovelife in the past that
left them severely bruised.
So how do you love such a person? That person could be someone
you’ve started dating or someone you are married to.
1. Affirm him/her. Keep saying “I love you”
2. Do not judge him/her. Such a person is a already getting a lot of
judgement from everyone and needs you to offer a difference voice
3. Create a safe haven for him/her to open up to you and share
with you the inner struggles. Sometimes the greatest healing
happens by having someone to talk to and not be afraid
4. Be patient with his/her healing, do not rush
5. Do not belittle what they are going through, it may not be a big
deal to you, but you are not the one feeling the burden
6. Allow the person to feel comfortable as themselves around you
so that he/she doesn’t pretend to be what you expect them to be
7. Find out what that person is passionate about and ignite a spark
by speaking more about it
8. Show love and respect to him/her in private and public to show
that you are loyal
9. Tap into the success stories of his/her past so to make him/her
remember how success tastes like
10. Be vulnerable too. Show him/her you have scares too. Also
share your frustrations in life, low moments and fears
11. Help them to have the rights perspective of who God is. God is
love but such a person might be feeling condemned or God has left
12. Touch the person more. A hug, a touch of his/her skin. It
communicates love
13. Pray for the person, preferably in his/her presence. Someone
who is hurting may not have the desire to pray, but they feel cared
for when you pray on their behalf
14. Compliment him/her more than you complain. This inspires the
person to become better
15. Do not be his/her crutch, entertaining their pity state, lovingly
show him/her the potential inside
16. Expose the person to a new world where life is happening, in
their terms. If you insist on your way, he/she will repel; but when
you’re gentle, courteous, asking for permission, he/she will follow
your lead
17. Keep the person busy, get to do activities together that lead to
a sense of fulfillment
18. Do not show the person that you are better than him//her. Stay
humble and sensitive
19. Flirt, laugh, be naughty with him/her. Sometimes be a clown
just to have a good laugh
20. Speak life over him/her. Counter and cancel the negative stuff
he/she has been told or is telling them-self
21. Remind the person they are not charity. You are not with him/
her because you feel sorry for them
22. Show the person he/she has power and that healing is up to
them, you are a support system


  1. Good news

  2. Nice upload

  3. Ok

  4. Thanks

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