Is time to quit your relationship, do not manage it

The lady had been without child for a long time. She had tried
everything within the book to have a child, but it all failed.
Therefore, she decided, “fine, am cool with this..” Accepted the
situation and started living her life. It’s called Habituation; ‘The
process of people or animals becoming used to something, so that
they no longer find it unpleasant.’ Ever wondered how people who
stay near noisy places like bars survive? It’s because they reach a
point where the noise doesn’t bother them anymore. They adapt to
the situation and live with it. That’s why people will stay in a house
which has a strange aroma and be ok. It’s only a visitor who will
wonder; ‘how do they survive.’ People will stay in relationships that
are killing them because they have adapted to the foolishness of
the other person. We get so used to our situation, accept it and
don’t want anyone to tell us otherwise. That is why, when the
prophet Elisha said to the lady: “About this time next year, you will
hold a son in your arms.” She immediately responded & objected..
“No, my lord! Please, man of God, don’t mislead your servant!
Meaning, “I have tried that before, it can’t work”… So she would
rather remain in the same situation, suffering in quiet desparation.
When Jesus said to the man at the well after 38 years of waiting
for a healing, “Do you want to get healed?” Instead of just saying
yes, he started justifying his situation; “there is no man to move
me when the waters are steered, bla, bla, bla” Shut up man; “do
you want to get healed?”
It is said, when you put a frog in hot water, it immediately jumps
out to safety and does not get killed by the hot water. But if you
put a frog in cold water, then start heating the water slowly, the
frog begins to adjust to the heat of water and stays in it. However,
by the time it realises this is not a safe place to be in, it would have
wasted a lot of energy habituating to the situation that it has no
more than energy to jump out. And so it dies, not necessarily
because the water was hot, but due it’s on naivety. The same thing
happens in relationships, careers, jobs and many other situations.
At first, things are okay. But then when we can see that things are
no longer the same, we hold on to ‘dear life’ adjusting ourselves to
situations that will absolutely not change and before we realise it,
we are in-too-deep and can’t come out and so we stay to the very
‘death’ of our own selves. We stay not because we want to, but
because we have put in too much, have so much responsibilities
and there are too many stakeholders involved to quit.
What we don’t realise is that the water is getting hotter and we are
being drained of energy, by the time we say ‘enough is enough’,
we are operating at zero energy and we can’t come out. Due to the
‘Boiling Frog Syndrome,’ there are many people who have stayed
in very detrimental relationships, dead jobs and toxic environments
until they are virtually out of life. They are looking for an easy way
out. Which does not exist. Some things can only change if and
when you radically jump out of the hot water. It may not be
comfortable outside because you have been so used to your
situation, but that’s what it takes. You may experience bad
withdraw symptoms, that’s why alcoholics and drug addicts
relapse easily. However, you cannot change your situation if you
don’t have the courage to jump out. There are no guarrantees out
their, but there are no guarrantees in here too. That’s why the four
lepers said; “Why stay here till we die? If we say, ‘We’ll go into the
city’–the famine is there, and we will die. And if we stay here, we
will die. So let’s go over to the camp of the Arameans and
surrender. If they spare us, we live; if they kill us, then we die.”
Most people would rather die of the familiar, than venture out and
see if the unfamiliar will give them a chance to live. The saying
“the devil you know is better than the angel you don’t know” has
kept a lot of people under the torment of the devil because they are
too scared to venture out and see what the angel has to offer.
They everyday romance and go to bed with the same devil, that
they can’t imagine life with an angel. A lot of women in abusive
relationships who won’t come out because of “atleast I have a
man”… Why live an atleast life, when there could be an utmost life
out there.. That’s why the Lord said to Moses; “You have circled
this mountain long enough. Now turn north”. You may never know
what is in the north until you turn there. But for now, get yourself
out of there. It’s up to you to make a choice ‘Jump Out or Die In.

2 Comments

  1. Yes…its true.

  2. Ok

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