A decade after his marriage was rocked by the revelation his wife cheated on him, one former soldier is once again having to deal with the fall-out .
In the second year of his marriage, he was deployed away from home.
Taking to Reddit, he explained how, in this time, his wife “slept with Some D***head (who I’ll refer to as SD from here out) who she was loose acquaintances with growing up.
He adds: “She hadn’t seen him in years but he just happened to show up during my daughter’s birthday party because he was the son of one of my mother-in-law’s old friends. SD and my wife hooked up later that week after reconnecting.”
Despite this bump in the road, the husband decided to try and make it work, explaining: “The reason I didn’t kick my wife’s a** to the curb and eventually forgave her is because she told me herself soon after I got home.
“And she didn’t try to justify it with the ‘oh well you were gone, i felt lonely blah blah blah’.
“No she actually said straight up that she was a f*****g d*****s (her words not mine, though I agree) and she felt so sick and disgusting for doing it.”
Fast-forward ten years, and a lot “counselling and healing” and the mother of the man the wife had a fling with reveals he died in a workplace incident – and also passed on the funeral details.
This is where it gets complicated – his wife wants to attend the funeral and it’s brought a lot of painful emotions back for him.
“My wife told me this and that she wanted to go and it was like I got kicked right in the d***,” he shared.
“I instantly felt nauseous and had f******g horrible flashbacks of when she told me about her affair. All those horrible feelings resurfaced along with the s****y memories of me crying my f*****g eyes out and my image of her shattering.
“The pain felt as fresh as when she dropped that bomb on me.”
His wife says she feels like it’s the right thing to do, but the husband can’t shake the feeling of being disrespected.
In the end, he reveals that he’s told her she can’t go, a decision which has divided opinion.
On the one hand, people thought it made no sense for her to go, especially considering his feelings.
One supporter wrote: “wtf would she contribute to the healing process of the funeral? She would almost certainly be asked “how did you know the deceased?” Oh, I had an affair with him 10 years ago.”
That said, others argued that she did have a right to go.
“I think it’s reasonable for him to be upset, but also understandable that the wife wants closure and to pay respects to someone she once knew without some underlying motive or still having feelings for said person,” someone else wrote.