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Things every girl REALLY wants: Sometimes all it takes is one
simple statement : “ You ’ re the only woman I want . ” Confession: I haven ’ t been anybody’ s girlfriend in a long time . This year will be my thirteenth wedding anniversary, so it ’ s been a minute since I had the kind of concerns you have when you ’ re straddling that
fence between single and legally committed . At heart , though , I
think we all have a similar list of things we really want but are
really hesitant to ask for , whether we ’ ve been dating someone fora month , or been married to them for a decade . Things like
1. Compliment her .
Listen , I ’ m an intelligent , well- read, deep- thinking feminist type of
woman , but I still like it when my husband tells me I look
beautiful. I know I ’ m good at a lot of things , but I still like it when
he tells me he’ s proud of me . It ’ s not just generic “ you ’ re pretty ”
compliments we ’ re looking for . Be sincere about it .
Focus on the things you really do love about her , and tell her . Tell
her how her eyes are the color of the first sky you remember
really seeing. Let her know that the way she dances across the
kitchen when she thinks no one is looking makes your whole face
smile. Ask her if she knows how her hair falling over her face in
the morning light before she wakes makes you swoon . Tell her
she ’ s funny , tell her she ’ s brave. And yeah , tell her she ’ s
2. Hold her when she ’s crying .
I ’ m a crier. I cry , a lot . Movies , books , commercials , songs ,
people winning something , whatever . If there ’ s an emotional
component involved , I ’ m going to need a box of Kleenex . I don’ t
expect my husband to comfort me when I ’ m losing it over a ten –
year – old episode of Friends , but there are times when I really need
him to intuitively understand when I ’ m craving the comfort of his
arms around me.
Don ’ t be afraid to do the same for your girlfriend . She didn’ t get
the job she was dreaming of, she had a massive fight with her
best friend, someone she loves is dying — go to her , pull her
close , make yourself a safe space for her to fall to pieces . And
definitely have tissues on standby.
3. Express tender gestures .
We don’ t need our life with you to resemble a romance novel , but
there are many small , sweet things you can do that will make her
feel both desired and cherished. Tuck her hair behind her ear .
Hold her face in your hands when you kiss . Scratch her back until
she falls asleep
4. Reassure her every now and then .
It ’ s human nature to invent worst case scenarios at two o ’ clock in
the morning before a big meeting at work the next day , or to
dream about your partner cheating and wake up pissed off and
upset . Needing reassurance does not equal neediness .
Sometimes all it takes is one simple statement : “ You ’ re the only
woman I want . ” Logically , we know that , but there are times when
our rational mind is overcome by insecurity or hormones or the
current cover of Maxim . I ’ m not saying you have to indulge that ,
just, you know , extend a little bit of gentleness.
5. Do stuff to help her
Wash the dishes. Fold the laundry. Change the sheets on the bed .
Rinse your plate and put it in the dishwasher . Mow the yard . Give
the kids a bath. Search for the missing socks . We handle this junk
all the time , you guys , and you ’ re guaranteed second base at
minimum if you would do some of these things unprompted from
time to time .
Most of the time we don’ t ask because we don’ t like to nag, but
seriously , just vacuum the living room or sweep the kitchen.
Coming home to a clean house is powerful aphrodisiac .
6. Encourage her .
It ’ s so easy for women to lose themselves in the girlfriend /wife /
mother roles . Remind your girl of the things she ’ s really good
at and encourage her in her hobbies. Give her a gentle nudge out
the door to go hang with her friends .
Make sure she has space to grow on a personal level that has
nothing to do with you , and don’ t feel threatened by positive
change . She had an entire life before you , and she might need to
be reminded of that sometimes . You might need to
remind yourself of that sometimes .
7. Commit to her .
Don ’ t stop reading! Don ’ t close the browser ! I ’ m not advocating
an immediate proposal . This isn ’ t about spending two months ’
salary on a ring or immersing yourself in brochures for
honeymoon destinations . I ’ m talking emotional commitment .
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  1. Nice update

  2. Enter your comment here…good

  3. Ok

  4. Good talk

  5. Nice post

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